Campbell McGrath

Rice and Beans

"Dad?" Yes. "You are a wimp." That's very nice, thank you. Eat your grilled cheese. "I say you are a little wimp. I learn that at school. From a big kid." Of course. "Tyrannosaurus Rex, King of the Dinosaurs!" Sam is two and a half. When he roars I stick a spoonful of rice and beans into his mouth. "Dad, did Rex eat ricey-beans?" I think so. "No! He was a meat eater." That's right. "They think he was a meat eater." Who? "Scientists. Dad?" Yes. "Does beans have bones?" No. "Do cheese have bones?" No. "Why do they change the name of brontosaurus to apatosaurus?" I honestly don't know. "Scientists know. They know, Dad." Yes. Probably. Drink some water, please. "Dad, water does not have bones." True. "Water does have hands." Right. "Usually, dogs have no hands. But Scooby Doo have hands. Why, Dad?" He's not a real dog. "Did he die out?" He's just a cartoon dog. "Do Scooby Doo eat ricey-beans-cartoon ricey-beans?" No. Yes. Probably. I think so. Eat your sandwich. "Dad, I no call you little wimp before. Rex call you little wimp." That's not a nice thing to call someone, is it? "Rex is not nice. Rex mean!" Sam roars and I stick a crust of sandwich in his mouth. "Dad, can I have a cookie? Vanilla cookie? Please." You haven't finished your grilled cheese, have you? "That's just the bones, Dad. Toast bones."

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