| Excerpt
from Mark Krewatch's "Natural & Temporary"
My father can fix anything. He can make the cabinet
door work again, the toilet, the light switch. He has
toolboxes of cold metal wrenches and sockets and screwdrivers
that turn any bolt or screw, whining saws that cut wood
into any shape, and gauges with dials that rotate in
clicks and snaps to tell him what’s wrong with
any cord. He has hammers of steel and rubber and wood.
Pliers that cut, bend, and twist. Clamps, drills, straps,
punches, tapes, glues, oils, and jellies. A filing cabinet
of tiny drawers filled with washers and nuts and hinges
and bits of colored wire that he rolls between his thumb
and forefinger until he knows which is right for the
job.
I follow him around the house, handing him tools and
watching him put them to work. His arms and hands, rigid
with lines of muscle, move with stiff, metered precision,
as mechanical as the tools. As he works, I ask what’s
this, what’s that, what’s any and all of
it about? Then I answer oh when he tells me about wattage
and voltage and Ohm-age, when he explains torque and
elasticity and inertia, when he pulls a mechanical pencil
and tiny tablet from his front pocket to draw grids
and circles and squiggles. I’m eight.
After he hangs the new reading lamp over my bed, he
splices an egg-sized hand switch into the lamp’s
cord so that when I wake up in the night I won’t
have to reach up to the fixture itself to turn it on.
I hand him the stubby red-and-blue-handled Phillips
head, and he screws together the halves of the switch’s
casing with rhythmic quarter turns of his wrist, explaining
to me the relationship of resistance to current as he
goes. I don’t try to understand. All I care about
is that now when I startle awake, I won’t have
to lie there panting in the darkness with the covers
over my head. I won’t have to scan the room for
shadows until panic forces me to jump from the bed and
run out my door and down the nightlight-lit hall to
my parents’ room to sleep on the floor.
My father holds the switch in his palm and flicks the
toggle back and forth with his thumb, turning the lamp
off and on, then drapes the cord over the headboard,
so the switch lies on the mattress. He tells me to try
it. I run my own thumb over the ribbed mold of the brown
plastic and feel the coolness of the crossed heads of
the screws. It’s the perfect size for my hand.
All I have to do is slide my arm from the covers, wrap
it in my fist and squeeze, and my room will fill with
light.
Back to IR Winter
2004
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