Every once and a while I think to myself, “Doug, you’re being such a grumpy pants right now.” And then, after some quality grumpy time, I think to myself, “Stop.”
This is one of those times. There was a leak in my apartment this morning, which was unpleasant, so, to keep myself from turning into Mr. Why Isn’t the World as Grumpy as Me, let me present to you a list of things I’m excited about:
1. I just found out that the Bloomington Bagel Company not only has iced coffee, but HAZELNUT ICED COFFEE. This is going to dramatically change my life.
2. The artist Andy Alcala has work on the cover of our latest issue. What we haven’t mentioned yet is that Andy has been painting these masterpieces ON HIS OWN FACE. That is not a model. That is the artist. He even does his own eyelids! Talent.
3. Our latest issue (mentioned in #2) is shipping now!
4. A puppy climbed the mountain of boxes in our office:
Inside those boxes? You guessed it! Copies of our new issue. We have a lot of them. You should order one. You know, if you like strong stories and compelling poetry and enlightening essays.
5. Bacon.
6. Chocolate milk.
7. Crystal Bowersox is going to be in town on July 28. I love her. She was totally robbed of the 2010 American Idol crown. Remember this performance? Please.
8. Discussing haircut options with our editor. I mean, hers looks great as is:
but mine’s a train wreck (note the absence of photo) and we’re probably ready to do something hip with our hair. Maybe.
Also, yes, that’s our new issue featured prominently in the photo. Also, that’s our new TURQUOISE ROLLING CUSHY CHAIR OF MAGIC.
9. One of our new issue‘s contributors, D. Gilson, just released a chapbook from Sibling Rivalry Press. It’s called Brit Lit and – get this! – it’s filled with poems about Britney Spears. ALSO I READ IT AND IT’S INCREDIBLE.
10. Lists that go on to ten points just to mention once again the main point. Excitement!
Dear Doug Paul Case,
Having those ‘Why Isn’t the World as Grumpy as Me’ moments happens to the best of us. I have to sit down at least three or four times a day to think about the things that are exciting! Anyways, I absolutely adore that you can list so many amazing things, write, and forget about the frustration your leaking apartment left you with. I see people every single day moping around all day, cursing the world just because of the smallest things like a broken hairbrush or a run in their hose. They can’t brush it off and think of the positive things in life like you! Your life must be very positive and easily lived since you have figured out how to surpass one of the most difficult obstacles in life.
This is an arltice that makes you think “never thought of that!”